Perhaps you’ve made some of these requests before…
“Honey, let’s go for a walk.”
“I’m tired today. I just don’t feel like cooking.”
“Let’s join a pottery class for fun!”
But instead of a positive reaction, your spouse turns away from you and says…
“I’m tired too. Why don’t you go with your friends?” “Sorry, I’m busy with work.” “Can you just sort it out please?”
It hurts, and slowly but surely, your requests get less and less. These requests are called bids for connection, and this concept was birthed out of a research done by Dr John and Julie Gottman, world-renowned relationship experts. In this research, couples that pay attention to each other’s bids for connection and turn towards their partner tend to stay married longer.
Watch the full video to learn more about how “turning towards” your spouse can make a real difference for your marriage.